Psalm Meditation 1057 Proper 20 September 20, 2020 Psalm 38 1 O Lord, do not rebuke me in your anger, or discipline me in your wrath. 2 For your arrows have sunk into me, and your hand has come down on me. 3 There is no soundness in my flesh because of your indignation; there is no health in my bones because of my sin. 4 For my iniquities have gone over my head; they weigh like a burden too heavy for me. 5 My wounds grow foul and fester because of my foolishness; 6 I am utterly bowed down and prostrate; all day long I go around mourning. 7 For my loins are filled with burning, and there is no soundness in my flesh. 8 I am utterly spent and crushed; I groan because of the tumult of my heart. 9 O Lord, all my longing is known to you; my sighing is not hidden from you. 10 My heart throbs, my strength fails me; as for the light of my eyes—it also has gone from me. 11 My friends and companions stand aloof from my affliction, and my neighbors stand far off. 12 Those who seek my life lay their snares; those who seek to hurt me speak of ruin, and meditate treachery all day long. 13 But I am like the deaf, I do not hear; like the mute, who cannot speak. 14 Truly, I am like one who does not hear, and in whose mouth is no retort. 15 But it is for you, O Lord, that I wait; it is you, O Lord my God, who will answer. 16 For I pray, “Only do not let them rejoice over me, those who boast against me when my foot slips.” 17 For I am ready to fall, and my pain is ever with me. 18 I confess my iniquity; I am sorry for my sin. 19 Those who are my foes without cause are mighty, and many are those who hate me wrongfully. 20 Those who render me evil for good are my adversaries because I follow after good. 21 Do not forsake me, O Lord; O my God, do not be far from me; 22 make haste to help me, O Lord, my salvation. (NRSV) It is possible to reach a point in our lives in which all of the unconfessed sins we have committed pile up around us and over us, crushing us with their weight. For the psalmist the weight has become such that friends and even adversaries notice that there is something going on. Friends, neighbors, and companions are at a loss as to what is needed from them, so they retreat, leaving the psalmist alone. Those who have any ax to grind see this as an opportunity to jump in and cause significant hurt in the life of the psalmist. Those out to do this damage may have been hurt by, or simply chose the psalmist as an easy target of their own hurt. The psalmist chooses to be open to the presence of God for deliverance from the weight of sin and from those who would celebrate the psalmist’s downfall. The psalmist does not ask for the destruction of these adversaries; the plea is for salvation, for a renewed sense of wholeness, and oneness with God. The psalmist models a good path for us. In the event that we wait until we are buried in our sin, it is good to confess before we are crushed by those sins. And when our friends turn away from us out of discomfort, and our adversaries move to do us harm, we do well to turn to God. The psalmist turns away from the abandonment on one hand and the attacks on the other, in order to find an answer in God. In these most dire circumstances the psalmist trusts that God is the source of salvation. September 14, 2020 LCM